It's the little things that tickle me.
Little things that I notice about myself since losing weight.
I have one chin.
I have a collarbone. I have bones in my shoulders. I have tendons behind my knees (noticed while shaving my legs in the shower) and it's hard to shave around my ankle because there's an indentation behind the ankle bone.
I have knuckles. I am wearing rings on fingers I never thought I would. I have bones in my wrists. Hip bones? I have them. Prominant rib cage...when I'm laying down, but it's there.
I'm not short-winded. It takes a lot more to wear me out, my endurance and stamina are high. I can shop all day without blinking an eye. My feet get tired before I do.
I love the way my husband looks at me, and calls me "Skinny Lady" or his tiny woman, and when he hugs me his arms wrap all the way around me. He commented the other day on my "chicken legs" with his trademark smirk. He can pick me up now, and we surprised the kids when he walked into the kitchen with him giving me a piggy-back ride. He even asked me if I'm wearing a bikini this summer. HA!! Yeah, right...NOT happening! I may be thinner, but I'm certainly not bikini thin! But the thought behind it makes me pretty happy.
I also have noticed little things that don't tickle me so much, and that's mostly about flabby skin. Namely my wings. However, these lovely flappy wings of mine are not going to stop me from wearing sleeveless shirts this summer. I haven't gone sleeveless in public since high school, and I thought I was a cow then so I rarely did it then either.
You always hear how it's about the little things in life...it's true.
Friday, April 8, 2011
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
Good Enough to Eat
Last week I bought a book from amazon.com that I was really looking forward to reading. Bonus, it was on sale.
It came yesterday. I started reading it last night before I went to bed, and I haven't wanted to put it down since. It's called "Good Enough to Eat" by Stacey Ballis. It is about a woman who sheds 145 lbs., starts leading a healthier life, has her husband leave her for a fat woman, and has to rebuild her life. This character thinks almost exactly like I do. Obsessions with food, relationships with other people....
As my son is taking his nap, I'm reading more of the book. I came upon this part, and feel I have to share because in a nutshell, it's how I feel.
"I run a hot bath for myself, and as it fills, I let my robe drop to the floor and look at myself in the mirror. I have a good face, not beautiful, at least not to me, but reasonably attractively put together, handsome. But my body bears the scars of a lifetime of obesity. White stretch marks line the front of my stomach, my thighs, striate my breasts, which were once a lush 42DDD and are now a 36D, hanging deflated, defeated. The skin of my upper arms, my inner thighs, and over my abdomen is loose, and while there is excellent muscle tone underneath, the skin, which once was taut over soft pillows of fat, now slides in waves over the space I worked so long to create...My butt, which once loomed in a massive shelf jutting out over my lower back like the stern of a proud sailing vessel, has somehow dropped into a sad double teardrop. ...With the right bra, I have a great rack. But naked, naked I look like a newborn bird without feathers; something is not quite finished about me. I never wanted to get the excess skin removal surgery; it is costly and debilitating. But I also never really thought about being here. In this place.....But I feel like a fraud. Because however good I look dressed, however normal I appear to be in public, once you strip me down, I have essentially the body of an old woman."
I can't wait to finish this book, yet I don't want it to end.
You can find it here: http://www.amazon.com/Good-Enough-Eat-Stacey-Ballis/dp/B004LQ0EFA/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1302106851&sr=1-1
It came yesterday. I started reading it last night before I went to bed, and I haven't wanted to put it down since. It's called "Good Enough to Eat" by Stacey Ballis. It is about a woman who sheds 145 lbs., starts leading a healthier life, has her husband leave her for a fat woman, and has to rebuild her life. This character thinks almost exactly like I do. Obsessions with food, relationships with other people....
As my son is taking his nap, I'm reading more of the book. I came upon this part, and feel I have to share because in a nutshell, it's how I feel.
"I run a hot bath for myself, and as it fills, I let my robe drop to the floor and look at myself in the mirror. I have a good face, not beautiful, at least not to me, but reasonably attractively put together, handsome. But my body bears the scars of a lifetime of obesity. White stretch marks line the front of my stomach, my thighs, striate my breasts, which were once a lush 42DDD and are now a 36D, hanging deflated, defeated. The skin of my upper arms, my inner thighs, and over my abdomen is loose, and while there is excellent muscle tone underneath, the skin, which once was taut over soft pillows of fat, now slides in waves over the space I worked so long to create...My butt, which once loomed in a massive shelf jutting out over my lower back like the stern of a proud sailing vessel, has somehow dropped into a sad double teardrop. ...With the right bra, I have a great rack. But naked, naked I look like a newborn bird without feathers; something is not quite finished about me. I never wanted to get the excess skin removal surgery; it is costly and debilitating. But I also never really thought about being here. In this place.....But I feel like a fraud. Because however good I look dressed, however normal I appear to be in public, once you strip me down, I have essentially the body of an old woman."
I can't wait to finish this book, yet I don't want it to end.
You can find it here: http://www.amazon.com/Good-Enough-Eat-Stacey-Ballis/dp/B004LQ0EFA/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1302106851&sr=1-1
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